HONESTLY, you wait for one bank holiday to come along and then another one comes along just after it.

And just like buses, they’re noisy, occasionally dirty and you always end up sitting next to the weirdo who wants to tell you what he’s having for tea. I’m having hoops, me, and I can’t wait, incidentally…

It’s May Day on Monday, May 1, when we celebrate workers’ rights, so let’s have a woop woop woop for all the pub and club staff and all the musicians who will be working their collective ‘nads off over this bumper holiday weekend while you’re out caning it like a good ‘un.

And there are plenty of live music events going on, with another Tea on the Quay at the Rendezvous in Weymouth on Sunday, April 30.

They’ve just had some artificial turf put down outside to give it that extra festival feel and I understand it’s specially designed for pubs as it’s delivered already half-cut.

Anyways, the music starts at midday on Sunday.

The Lazy Lizard is hosting their Spring Break on the Sunday, April 30, too with music from 3pm to 3am.

Over the Town Bridge, The Boot is hosting another two-day bash, starting at 3pm on Saturday, April 29 and Sunday, April 30.

And they’re having it rather large in Dorchester’s Brewery Square with live music starting at 11am on both the Saturday and Sunday.

Aside from the multi-band bashes, there are quite a few gigs worth checking out, including a swashbuckling visit of The Captain’s Beard to Finns in Weymouth tonight, Friday, April 28.

Now, I’ve always thought I’d make a good pirate because I have avast behind, but these guys are the real deal. Yes they ARRRR!

Hailing from Brighton, or Port Syphilis as they like to call it, they met up via the popular pirate dating app Shiver Me Tinder and as their head honcho Cap’n Clement tells me: “Yarrr! The Captain’s Beard be a company o’ travellin’ troubadours from Brighton on a quest te bring the finest o’ sea shanties and forebitters to the ears of all who’ll listen.

“We play songs of the grog, grot and grime that comes from o’ life travellin’ the high seas and all the villainous depravity in between, dyarr!”

Well, if it’s villainous depravity they’re after, they’ll be right at home at Finns.

Moving on, and if you have the sudden need to hear what a British punk band playing in a sleazy 1930s New Orleans dive armed only with instruments dating from 1890s Tennessee sounds like, you’ve got two chances this weekend to sate your filthy urges, you disgusting doxy you.

Jo Carley and the Old Dry Skulls, for that is they, throw old time woop-ass country and blues, ska and punk into a busted-up backwoods barrel to make a potent mayhem of musical moonshine.

Jo takes care of vocals while mangling the mandolin and whacking the washboard, while other half Tim bashes the banjo and stomps the stomp box.

They’re at the Ropemakers in Bridport tonight, Friday, April 28, before yee-hawing their way up the B3157 in their chuck wagon to the Belvedere in Weymouth tomorrow night, Saturday, April 29.

Next week, I’ll be chatting to local hero Nick Capaldi about his new Neon Heart album and his UK tour which kicks off at the Weymouth Pavilion next Saturday, May 6.

Have a great holiday weekend and don’t get lost or killed.

Till next time…

BY STRANGE coincidence, there are two Oasis tributes duking it out in the car park like the brothers Gallagher for your attention next Friday, May 5. So here’s the story, morning glory… In the red corner are Noasis who are at the Electric Palace in Bridport. Since forming in 2006, they’ve clocked up more than 600 gigs and claim to be more than a tribute band, they’re Oasis in a parallel universe.

Support comes from Bridport’s The Gravity Drive and tickets are £11 from box office on 01308 428354.

Meanwhile, in the blue corner, on the same night at Weymouth Pavilion, Oas-is (the hyphen makes all the difference, apparently) will be paying homage to Liam and Noel and they claim they’re definitely, and not maybe, the most authentic act.

Support comes from Weymouth’s very own Stereoironics who played a sell-out gig down in Exeter recently with the boys from Oas-is and are hoping to do the same in their home town.

They’ve virtually moved in at Butlins at Minehead, such is their popularity at tribute and 90s nights, and they can’t wait for Stereophonics’ mainman Kelly Jones to pull his flippin’ finger out and write some new songs so they can learn them and expand their set list.

Tickets for the Pavilion show are £13 from the box office on 01305 783225

MOST of the Kings of Oblivion present a cheque for £1,183.88 to Diane Bentley, left, from the Weldmar Hospicecare fundraising office, the proceeds of their Bowie: Another Evening of Sound and Vision event held at the New Vic in Weymouth on Easter Sunday, April 16.

The band comprises musicians from several of south Dorset’s most popular bands, including Freezer, Vanilla Radio, The Mighty Fine, Dr Robert, Half-Dead Darlings, Freak Circus, The Dinnerladies and The Million Dollar Bash, and got together for the second time to celebrate the music of the late David Bowie and raise money for the south Dorset hospice which cares for people with life-limiting illnesses.

GIG GUIDE

TONIGHT (28)

Teddy Rocks 2017 (Charisworth Farm, Blandford)

Skimmity Hitchers (Corn Exchange, Dorchester)

Captain’s Beard (Finns, Weymouth)

Sheryl Lee (Park, Weymouth)

Moonshine HIllbillies (Belvedere, Weymouth)

Mike Walker (Weymouth Working Mens Club)

Chris Woodchuck (Edinburgh House of Sounds, Weymouth)

The Shakespearos (King Arms, Weymouth)

Broadband (Royal Portland Arms, Portland)

Billy Solo (Wellington, Weymouth)

Shooter (Market House, Weymouth)

Saxuality (Gloucester, Weymouth)

Tripod (Golden Lion, Weymouth)

The Dolmen (Rock, Weymouth)

Finnian (Black Dog, Weymouth)

Jo Carley and the Old Dry Skulls (Ropemakers, Bridport)

Toby De Kretser (Royal Standard, Upwey, Weymouth) 8pm.

Regulation 9 (Wyke Smugglers, Weymouth)

SATURDAY (29)

Teddy Rocks 2017 (Charisworth Farm, Blandford)

Minor Fret, Side Door Project, Rich Baxter, Powelly, Shooter (Boot, Weymouth) From 3pm.

Julie Storey’s Let’s Dance, Tom Waters/Julie Lewis Trio, Trip, Amy Thompson (Brewery Square, Dorchester) From noon.

Drunk Education (Finns, Weymouth)

Andy Grant Trio (Sailors Return, Weymouth)

Steve Nicholas (Conservative Club, Weymouth)

Karen (Park, Weymouth)

Jo Carley and The Old Dry Skulls (Belvedere, Weymouth)

Blue Quays (Weymouth Working Mens Club)

The Silhouettes (Wyke Regis Working Mens Club, Weymouth)

The Katz (RBL Club, Portland)

Darren H (Edinburgh House of Sounds, Weymouth)

The Shakespearos (Rock, Weymouth)

Dakota (Golden Lion, Weymouth)

Xander and the Keys (Kimberlin Club, Portland)

Alexander Soul Man (Gloucester, Weymouth)

Drive By Jamming (Black Dog, Weymouth)

Loz and Ricardo (Centenary Club, Weymouth)

Pronghorn (Ropemakers, Bridport) Koast (Royal Standard, Upwey, Weymouth) 7pm.

Sheila Tackya (Cafe Jagos, Dorchester)

Diane (Bridge Inn, Preston, Weymouth)

Strings and Reeds (Duke of Albany, Weymouth)

The Helm (Wyke Smugglers, Weymouth)

SUNDAY (30)

Teddy Rocks 2017 (Charisworth Farm, Blandford)

Toby De Kretser, Nina Garcia, Tim Somerfield, The Chase, Rich Baxter Duo, Under The Carousel, Blazing Strings, Southern Sinners, Triple Threat (Tea on the Quay, Rendezvous, Weymouth) From midday to 10pm…

Blazing Strings (Rendezvous, Weymouth) From 10pm

Drive By Jamming, Freaky Boys, Howling at the Moon, Tres Hombres, The Shakespearos (Boot, Weymouth) From 3pm.

Leggomen, Blazin’ Strings, Toby De Kretser, Jenny Sims, Matthew Taylor, Under The Carousel (Lazy Lizard, Weymouth) From 3pm-3am.

Toby De Kretser, Powelly, Identikit, Danny Adams, Blazing Strings (Ayya, Weymouth) From 4pm-2am.

Julie Storey’s Let’s Dance, Andy Grant, Smith and Moore, Mutter Slater (Brewery Square, Dorchester) From noon.

Dakota (Hope & Anchor, Bridport) 4.30-7pm, followed by..

Dakota (Finns, Weymouth)

Precinct of Sound (Belvedere, Weymouth)

Hustle (Nook, Weymouth)

Darren H (Edinburgh House of Sounds, Weymouth)

James Hollingsworth (Royal Portland Arms, Portland)

Replay (Red Lion, Hope Sq, Weymouth) 2pm.

Ricky Solo (Sailor’s Return, Weymouth) From 3pm.

Sheryl Lee’s Sunday Club (Edinburgh House of Sounds, Weymouth) 7pm.

Brass Monkeys (Gloucester, Weymouth)

Stacey Lou’s Amy Winehouse tribute (Rock, Weymouth)

TBC (Black Dog, Weymouth) 4-6pm.

Vivid Vague (Ropemakers, Bridport)

Caz Krelle, The Remedy (Royal Standard, Upwey, Weymouth) From 5pm.

The Collborators (Crown, Bridport) 4pm.

Jess Upton and the Guilty Pleasures (Pilot Boat Inn, Lyme Regis) Tickets £5 from 01297 443157.

The Marathon Man (Cafe Jagos, Dorchester) Karen (Duke of Albany, Weymouth) 5pm.

MONDAY (1)

The Rat Pack (Belvedere, Weymouth) From 4pm, followed by… Acoustic session (Belvedere, Weymouth)

Roger’s Singalong (Gloucester, Weymouth)

Ricky Solo (Edinburgh House of Sounds, Weymouth) From 4pm.

TUESDAY (2)

Ricky Solo (Edinburgh House of Sounds, Weymouth)

Quay Stage 2, Come All Ye Folk Session (Pilgrim House, Weymouth) 7.30pm

Folk Club (Drax Arms, Bere Regis)

WEDNESDAY (3)

Wessex Folk Night (Sailors Return, Weymouth)

Open Mic Night (Royal Exchange, Portland)

Open Mic (Bull, Fordington, Dorchester)

Dave Bowen and Jazz Friends (Three Compasses, Charminster)

THURSDAY (4)

Andy Grant (Thimble Inn, Piddletrenthide)

Leggomen (George, Weymouth)

Ricky Solo (Edinburgh House of Sounds, Weymouth)

Open Mic (George, Dorchester)

Traditional Tune Session (Cove House Inn, Portland)

Ukulele Sessions (Sailors Return, Weymouth)

FRIDAY (5)

Oas-is, Stereoironics (Weymouth Pavilion)

Noasis, Gravity Drive (Electric Palace, Bridport)

Fluke (Finns, Weymouth)

The Katz (Lugger, Chickerell, Weymouth)

Steve Payne Trio (Royal Portland Arms, Portland)

Billy Solo (Wellington, Weymouth)

Acoustic Session (Victoria Inn, Knights in the Bottom, Chickerell, Weymouth)

Andy Grant Trio (Brewhouse and Kitchen, Dorchester)

Open Mic with Dave Griff (Gloucester, Weymouth)

The Gravy Train (Britannia, Portland)

Matt Black (Park, Weymouth)

Sheryl Lee (Edinburgh House of Sounds, Weymouth)